"Hey Dad, when can I get a phone?"

“Hey Dad, when can I get a phone?”  

“Uh… I’m not sure. Why do you need a phone?”

“I want to play Pokemon GO.”

     I know, I know. Pokemon GO is soooo last summer. But my kids are still really into it, so I downloaded it on my phone just for them. It's been fun to play together as a family. Now, my kids are getting a little impatient waiting for me to come home from work each day to play. I knew it was only a matter of time before they popped the question.

     Even if your child hasn’t brought it up, it's a pretty safe bet to say he or she wants a phone, tablet, or computer (or all-of-the-above) for Christmas. Maybe you've been waiting until all the Black Friday and Cyber Monday deals are announced to find the best price, but there are still a few other things we should consider for clicking that "Buy Now" button. There's a lot of great opportunities for your kids online, but there's also a lot of real danger. 

• What device is best for your kids' needs (and wants)?
• What will they want to use it for?
• How will you protect your kids from cyberbullying, predators, pornography, and all the other nasty stuff out there?
• How will you prevent their new toy from becoming an obsession?

If you need some help answering these questions, here's some tips I've learned as I researched solutions for my own kids.

SMARTPHONES

     My kids want a smartphone so badly. The only actual purpose they can give me for having one is playing Pokemon GO, but your kids might be feeling the pressure that "everyone else has one!" If your children are older and you're thinking about getting them a phone, Protect Young Minds has a great blog post about which smartphone is best for kids. The author, Nathaniel Holzman, does a great job of walking through factors like ease of set up, parental controls, and pricing. I don’t want to spoil the ending, but you'll never guess the winner of his head-to-head comparison.

iPADS (AND OTHER TABLETS)

     The nice thing about iPads is that the parental controls are the exact same as on an iPhone; they run the same operating system. The same thing goes for Android tablets and Android smartphones. You can check out the same smartphone article from above for details on setting filters and security policies for your kids with either of those operating systems.

Laptops

     Beyond parental controls, the reality is that tablets and phones are more likely to be used on time-wasting games than a laptop. A good kid-friendly laptop has a bit more potential to help them learn things like keyboarding, computer coding, and design - all practical skills that are a lot easier to learn on a laptop than on a phone or tablet.

     BestProducts.com has a great list of kid-friendly laptops for every budget. With so many different manufacturers and operating systems, laptops can be difficult to secure with parental controls. If you want to filter or block the content your child can access on a laptop, you might want to look into a service like Blocksi, Mobicip, or NetNanny (the one we use in my house). Without a filtering service, a child with an understanding of browsers and extensions can figure out how to bypass filters and protections on a laptop.

What Will you Buy?

     This is by no means an exhaustive list of all of the things you could potentially get your kids this Christmas. If you’d like to dive into more research, it’s as easy as going to Google and searching “best tablet for kids” or “parental controls for a (fill in your device)." Remember that we, as parents, are ultimately responsible to make a wise choice for our family. Our kids may not get 100% of what they want, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t what is best for them.  

Just make sure they share their best Pokemon GO tips with you along the way.

What You Need to Know About Instagram and Your Kids

     It seems there is no end to the march of new apps, websites, and social media services. Instagram is one of the most popular social media services out there. With its recent redesign, additional features, and updated terms & conditions, now is a great time to take (another?) close look at this incredibly popular photo sharing app. 

     Technically, the minimum age to use Instagram (along with many other social media services) is 13. Unfortunately, it’s all too easy for a child with a smart phone or tablet to set up an account and fudge on their birthdate. The reality is Instagram isn’t for kids. Here’s a few reasons why:

     Chris McKenna recently blogged on Protect Young Minds. He shares 5 hidden dangers in Instagram. The scariest to me is the fact that the photos on instagram are not filtered in anyway whatsoever. It only takes a child a few minutes to understand how hashtag (#) searches work, and they can scan Instagram looking for pictures in any topic they want. The absence of parental controls and the easily erasable search history make Instagram dangerous ground for any kid. Chris warns they could easily find something they shouldn’t, and parents may never know.

     This article and video from Craig Gross on iParent.TV delves into similar dangers. He calls out the specific risk that children could directly access pornography through Instagram. While Instagram technically does not allow porn on its service, the workaround that people have found is using misspelled hashtags to represent pornographic images. This is a danger that no parent should take lightly.

Yikes.

     So what do you do with Instagram? First of all, if you have a child under 13, you should hold the line and not let them have an account. Second, after your child is old enough, have a specific conversation with them about the dangers of Instagram.

     Don’t get me wrong, Instagram can be a lot of fun. Camp of Champions USA has our own Instagram account (@cocusa1995), and we love connecting with our summer staff and parents through pictures and videos. But let’s be wise as we parent our kids through this and all social media services.  

     Do you or your child use Instagram? What have you done to protect you and your family from some of the dangers?

Web Catch of the Week: What's on Your Kid's Phone?

     As a kid, I remember when the internet only seemed to be a long sequence of weird noises that sounded like the slow death of a robot - dial-up, AOL CDs, and having to log off the computer so my mom could make a phone call. Now, like almost everyone else, I have an iPhone in my pocket that gives me instant access to the internet. This technology is cutting-edge, but so was dial up internet to my parent's generation. What we consider cutting-edge is already commonplace to our kids. They know how to use a smartphone or tablet without any kind of instruction, and they know how to use it better than you do.

What's on your kid's phone? How do you protect your kids from the dark places of the internet? What apps do your kids use on a daily basis?

     These questions can seem overwhelming, and that's where great websites like iParent.tv come in. iParent.tv, founded by Craig Gross, gives parents reviews about the latest apps, devices, social networks, and websites that your kids are using right now. "iparent.tv allows you to learn what’s safe, what’s not, and what you need to do about it." Check out their site to explore what your kids are doing on their smartphones, and how you can help guide them to live safely in a digital world.

     Maybe you've passed the point of prevention. Maybe you've seen your kids internet history, you know who they follow on Instagram, and now you don't know how to address the situation. XXXChurch.com is another website you want to check out. XXXChurch, also founded by Craig Gross, provides help for people of all ages dealing with pornography and sex addiction. For specific advice on how to talk to your kid about pornography, check out "I Just Caught My Kid Looking at Porn." You can also find resources on their site for just about any scenario you might find yourself in when it comes to adult content. 

     To be sure, this is a very sensitive topic for most people. Honestly, I'm fearful for the day that I have to talk to my son about pornography. It's been a temptation of mine since I was young, and there's nothing I want more for my children than to avoid the mistakes of their dad. My prayer is that I'll be able to communicate the severity of this sin while at the same time showing unconditional love. I'll cling to the words of Jesus, "I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world." -John 16:33 (NLT)